Emotionally safe relationships don’t avoid conflict. They have language for it. Here are a few phrases we teach, and why they matter: “I don’t want to fight. I really want to understand you.” → Signals safety. Lowers defensiveness. Shifts the goal from winning to connection. “I’m starting to build a story in my head. Can you help me check it?” → Interrupts assumptions before they harden into resentment. “I think I’m taking this personally. Can we slow down?” → Regulates the nervous system instea
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